Thursday, December 28, 2006

Adoption Loss

I came across this discussion on You Tube about a month ago. Had problems posting it so I put it on the back burner. The subject keeps coming before me so I'm going to try to post it again.

Quick background- A couple put a video on You Tube stating they were looking to adopt and a bit about them. Some people were behind them, others extremely against. The husband decided to ask for Pro AND Anti Adoption video responses. I think some very interesting and informative information came out of this for me. I have no idea what it feels like to place your child for adoption. I have ALWAYS called my son's previous (?) (birthmother) his birthmother. I NEVER thought that that might be insulting. I'm a bit turned around about it all and hope to delve deeper into this soon. I thought it might be something you all would want to know. We are all parents- current and future. What do we bring to our children of their history? What is their true story? What is the true story of the people who gave them life?

Thank You Rob (baseballgeek)


Some Responses:

adoptee3420 (2 months ago)
Please understand that a woman who has not yet relinquished a child and signed the papers is NOT a birthmother - she is the mother of that child. Calling a woman a birthmother while she is still carrying a child is insulting. Choosing to relinquish a child for adoption is a difficult decision and refering to her as a birthmother before she has done so shows no respect for her current position and labels her as a woman who has relinquished before she has even done so.


Candiliscious0489 (1 month ago)
Adoption is NOT an OPTION EVER!!! Adoption Kills the Natural Familiy!!! U wanna help an older child whom does need a home, thats fine, but not Adopting that child but being said child's Legal Guardian, so Name stays the same, Child never loses original Identity. I really hope u r gettin this, understanding Adoption is Evil!!!Read Primal Wound, it may help u more.


slc2 (1 month ago)
To 'adoption is evil' people.You get babies whose mothers have died,or are too physically or mentally ill to be able to ever possibly care for a child let alone themselves, this is what happened to my birth mother.My parents adopted me even knowing i could inherit it (am 100% fine :P)anyway we are extremely close,I feel I have a closer relationship with my Mum than any of my friends have with theirs,it can be offensive to adoptees to tell them their adoptive parents are not their 'real' parents.


One of the video responses:

A Relinquished Dream

Please take the time to read the posts attached to this video.

There is a website that is at the end of the video. What do you think?


There are video responses to video responses. You can get a little lost in there. But good to know the feelings of others on the subject.


An Open Adoption Story from the Adoptive Mother's Standpoint-

Open adoption, broken heart
I knew it would be hard for my daughter's birth mother to give her up. I just didn't expect to feel so guilty for taking her.
By Dawn Friedman


I am unable to put down words..........

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